Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Corn Stalk Battalion

Scalped, stripped, ramrod straight
they stand at attention in rows
that stretch across a cornfield
of foot-high golden stubble.
Summer's harvest remnants,
they stand, as if waiting to march,
to march without thought,
each stalwart stalk blindly
following the lead of another.

Like a thousand blonde
five-o'clock shadows
or soft, cool, summer buzz cuts,
like corn-fresh marines,
they're suspended somewhere
between fecundity and sterility,
row after row of sentinels
without voice, without power
plodding, compliant, persevering.

Sun beats down, dries the morning dew.
Cool breezes rustle parchment husks
like flags draped over returning coffins.
Pummeling sleet will freeze them,
redeeming rays will thaw and ease,
thaw and ease the constant burden
of the wait through winter's buildup,
its shortening days and ever colder nights
lancing deeply into the heart of each of them.

Soon, deep, deep snow will blanket
the lot, pile flake after flake
with winter rising, rising. until one day
they will all disappear--the whole battalion--
deadened corn stalks abandoned to the coming winter,
with only their tips visible, but soon to be buried
beneath a silent, suffocating siege.

5 Comments:

Blogger gfh said...

Sad and cold, J. Good title
-A:)

11:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is a great poem, Mom. One of the best I've read from you. One comment: I'm not sure I like, "and an administration bent on wargasm,/ playing war games with real live soldiers." This, especially "wargasm," seems out of place given the elegance of the rest of the language. And "war games" seems too easy an expression for the deep metaphor of the whole. I'm not sure i would understand the image exactly, precisely, had you not explained it to me, perhaps at "their tips now visible" you might somehow elucidate exactly how high these corn stalks are since harvest, how they've been abandoned to the coming winter. The last sentence gives me chills. An incredibly powerful whole.

Love,
Elizabeth

10:28 PM  
Blogger Judy said...

Thanks, Elizabeeee--

I've added "foot-high" to the line that previously read "a cornfield of golden stubble." That makes the image more clear--something I was struggling with. I wanted to make sure that the reader had a clear image of this cornfield in late autumn.

As for "wargasm," I'm keeping it for now, along with war games. The first term I can't take credit for; it came from a friend who likes to make up words, and I just love it. Think it's perfect for the orgy of warmongering this administration is bent on. War games comes from thinking about War College, where simulated war games on computers are the protocol for learning how to make war. I'm not as attached to it, but think it works okay for now.

Feel free to come back with other ideas... Always open...

J./Mom

9:39 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I really like "foot-high." I can see the whole picture much more clearly now. The two sentences with "war" feel like the start of another poem, and out of step with the rest of your language. It's as if you've created a picture with snowy, bleached colors for everything else, and then added two slashes of cartoon red. It's "administration" too, as much as "wargasm" that does it. Suddenly, I'm no longer in a corn field with two meanings, I'm in Washington D.C. and I'm thinking of war and sex and word puns. And then I'm supposed to go back in and take in the quiet, effortless suffocating ending -- with a totally different tone.

It's the combination of exact politics and exact sex with the great metaphor of everything else. And it's more purposefully explicit than "perceived rage..." I understand your intention, but it jars me, even as I like coming out of the corn field just enough to make your message clear, and then plunge back into the image for the close.

I really love this poem, and I want it to go all the way! MWAH, Elizabeth

7:02 PM  
Blogger Judy said...

Which two lines?

10:12 PM  

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